嫁娶

人道所以有嫁娶何?以為情性之大[者]，莫若男女，男女之交，人 (情) [倫]之始，莫若夫婦。《易》曰:"天地氤氳，萬物化淳，男女(稱)[搆]精，萬 物化生。" 人承天地，施陰陽，故設嫁娶之禮者，重人倫，(庶)[廣]繼嗣也。 《禮·保傅記》曰:"謹為子嫁娶，必擇世有仁羲者。"醴男娶女嫁何?陰卑，不得自 專，就陽而成之。故《傳》曰:"陽倡陰和，男行女隨。"

男不自專娶，女不自專嫁，必由父母，須媒妁何? 遠恥防淫決也。《詩》云:" 娶 妻如之何? 必告父母。"又曰:"娶妻如之何? 匪媒不得。"

男三十而娶，女二十而嫁[何]? 陽數奇，陰數偶。男長女幼者[何]? 陽[道] 舒，陰[道]促。男三十筋骨堅強，任為人父;女二十肌膚充盛，任為人母，合為五 十,應大衍之數，生萬物也。故《禮·內則》曰:"男(五)[三]十壯有室，女二十 壯而嫁。"七、歲之陽也，八、歲[之]陰也。七八十五，陰陽之數備，有相偶之志。 故《禮記》曰:"女子十五許嫁，舞而字。" 禮之稱字，陰繫於陽，所以專一之節也。 陽尊，無所繫。二十五繫者，就陰節也。 陽舒而陰促，三十數三終奇,陽節也; 二十數再終偶，陰節也。陽小成於陰，大成於陽，故二十而冠，三十而娶。陰小成於 陽,大成於陰，故十五而舞，二十而嫁也。

一說:《春秋·毅梁傳》曰:"男二十五繫 [心]，女十五許嫁弓感陰陽也。"陽數七，陰數八，男八歲毀齒，女七歲毀齒。陽數 奇,(故)三，三八二十四，加一為[二十]五，而繫心也。陰數偶，[故]再成十 四, (四)加一為[十]五，故十五許嫁也。各加一者，明[其]專一繫心。所以繫心 者何? 防其淫佚也。

《禮》曰:女子十五許嫁，納采，問名，納吉，請期，親週，以雁[為]贄。納徵 曰。玄縹，故不用雁。

贄用雁者，取其隨時[而]南北，不失其節，明不奪女子之時 也。[又是隨陽之鳥]，[妻從夫之義也]。又取飛成行，止成列也。明嫁娶之禮，長 幼有序，不相踰越也。又婚禮贄不用死雉，故用雁也。

納徵玄繃束帛離皮。玄三法 天，纁二法地也。陽奇陰偶，明陽道之大也。離皮者，兩皮也。以為庭實，庭實、偶 也。《禮昏經》曰:"納采、間名、納吉、請期、親迎皆用雁，納徵[用玄繃]、束 帛、離皮。"

納徵辭曰:"吾子有(加)[嘉]命，貺室某也。[某]有先人之禮，雕 皮束帛，使某[也]請納徵。"上某者、(聲)[埔]名也，[下某者、埔父名也], 下次某者、使人名也。女之父曰:"吾子順先典，貺某重禮，慕不敢辭，敢不承命。"

納采辭曰:"吾子有惠，貺(貺)室某[也]。某有先人之禮，使某也請納采。"對 曰:"某之子惷愚，又不能教，吾子命之，某不敢辭。"

天子下至士，必親迎授綏者何?以陽下陰也。欲得其歡心，示親之心也。夫親 迎，[御]輪三周，下車曲顧者，防淫決也。《詩》云:"文定厥祥，親迥于渭，造舟 為梁，不顯其光。"《禮昏經》曰:"賓升，北面，奠雁。再拜，拜手稽首降出，婦從 房中也，從降自西階，(揖)[壻]御婦車，授綏。"

遣女於彌廟者，重先人之遺(支)體也，不敢自尊，故告彌也。

父母親(男)[戒] 女何? 親親之至也。父曰:"誡之敬之，夙夜無違命。"女必有端繡衣若笄 之，母施襟結帨曰:" 勉之敬之，夙夜無違宮事。"父誡於阼階，母誡於西階，庶母 及門內施鞶，(祭紬)[申之]以[父]母之命，命[之]曰:" 敬恭聽爾父母[之] 書，夙夜無愆，視[諸]衿鞶。"

(祭)去不辭，誡不(誥)[諾]者，蓋恥之重去 也。

《禮》曰:""嫁女之家，不絕火三日，(相思)[思相]離也。娶婦之家，三 日不舉樂，思嗣親也。"感親年衰老代至也。《禮》曰:" 婚禮不賀，人之序也。"

授綏, 姆辭曰:" 未教，(未乞)[不足]與為禮也。"

始親迎，於辭曰: " 吾子命某以茲初昏，使某將請承命。"主人曰:"某故敬具以酒。"

父(命)醮子 遣之迎,命曰:" 往迎爾相，承我宗事，[勗]率以敬先妣之嗣，若則有常。"子曰: "諾，唯恐不堪，不敢忘命。"

娶妻不先告廟(到)者，示不必安也。婚禮請期，不敢必也。

婦(人) [入]三 月然後祭行，舅姑既沒，亦婦入三月奠采于廟。三月一時，物有成者，人之善惡可得知 也。然後可得事宗廟之禮。曾子曰:"女未廟見而死，歸葬于女氏之黨，示未成婦 也。"

嫁娶必以春者，春、天地交通，萬物始生，陰陽交接之時也。《詩》云:"士如 歸妻，迨冰未泮。"《周官》曰:"仲春之月，(合)[令]會男女，令勇三十娶，女 二十嫁。"《夏小正》曰:"二月，冠子娶婦之時。"

夫有惡行，妻不得去者，地無去天之義也。夫雖有惡，不得去也。故《禮·郊特 牲》曰:"一與之齊，終身不改。"悖逆人倫，殺妻父母，廢絕綱[紀]，亂之大者 [也]。義絕，乃得去也。

天子諸侯一娶九女[者]何?重國廣繼嗣也。適 (也)[九]者何?法地有九州， 承天之施，無所不生也。[一]娶九女，亦足以成君[之]施也。九而無子，百亦無 益也。《王度記》曰:"天子，窘一娶九女。"《春秋·公羊傅》曰:"諸侯娶一國， 則二國往賸之,以姪娣從。[謂]之姪者何?兄之子也。娣者何?女弟也。"

或曰:天 子娶十二女，法天有十二月，萬物必生也。

必一娶何? 防淫泆也。為其棄德嗜色，故一 娶而已。人君無再娶之義也。

備姪娣從者，為其必不相嫉妒也。一人有子，三人共之， 若己生之。

不娶兩娣何? 傳異氣也。娶三國女何? 廣異類也。恐一國血脈相似，俱 無子也。

姪娣年雖少，猶從適人者，明(人者明)人君無再娶之義也。還待年於父母之 國，未任荅君子也。《詩)云:"姪娣從之，祁祁如雲，韓侯顧之，爛其盈門。"《公 羊傅》曰:"叔姬歸于紀。"明待年也。

二國來謄，誰為尊者?大國為尊。國等以 德，德同以色。

質家法慼天尊左，文家法地尊右。所以不聘妾何?人有子孫，欲尊之， 義，義不可(永)[本]人以為賤也。《春秋傳》曰:"二國來賸。"

可求人為士， 不可求人為妾何? 士即尊之漸，賢不止於士，妾雖賢，不得為適。

娶妻卜之何? 卜女之德，知相宜否。《昏禮經》曰:" 將加諸卜，敢問女為譙氏" 也。

人君及宗子[無]哭母，自定娶者，卑不主尊，賤不主翼，故自定之也。《昏禮 經》曰:"親皆沒，己聘命之。"《詩》云:"文定厥祥，親迎于渭。"

大夫功成[受]封, 得備八妾者，重國廣繼嗣也。不更聘大國者，不忘本適也。 故《禮》曰:"納女於諸侯"，曰"備掃靋"。

天子[之太子]， 諸侯之世子，皆 以諸侯禮娶，與君同，示無再娶之羲也。

王者之娶，必先選于大國之女，禮儀備，所見多。《詩》云:"大邦有子，俔天之 妹,文定厥祥,親迎于渭。" 明王者必娶大國也。

《春秋》曰:"紀侯來朝。"紀子以 嫁女於天子,故增爵稱侯。至數十年之間，紀侯無他功，但以子為天王后，故爵稱侯。 知雖小國者，必封以大國，明其尊所不臣也。

王者娶及庶(人) [邦]者何?開天下之 賢，示不還善也。故《春秋》曰:"紀侯來朝。"(交)[文]加為侯，明封之也。 先封之，明不與(聖人)[庶邦]交禮也。

女行虧缺而去其國，如之何?以封為諸侯比例矣。

諸侯所以不得自(趣)[娶] 國中何? 諸侯不得專封，義不可臣其父母。《春秋 傅》曰:"宋三代無大夫，惡其內娶也。"

不娶同姓者，重人倫，防淫泆，恥與禽獸同也。《論語》曰:"君娶於吳，為同 姓，謂之吳盂子。"《曲禮》曰:"買妾不知[其]姓則卜之。"

外屬小功已上，亦不 得娶也。以《春秋傅》曰"譏娶母黨"也。

王者嫁女，必使同姓諸侯主之何? 婚禮貴和，不可相荅，為傷君臣之義，亦欲使女 不以天子[之]尊乘諸侯也。《春秋傳》曰:"天子嫁女于諸侯，必使諸侯同姓者主 之。諸侯嫁女于大夫，使大夫同姓者主之。" [必使同姓者]，以其同宗共祖，可以主 親也。故使攝父事。不使同姓卿主之何? 尊加諸侯，為威厭不得舒也。

不使同姓諸侯就 京師主之何? 諸侯親迎入京師，當朝天子，為禮不兼。《春秋傳》曰:"築(土) [王] 姬觀于外。"明不往京師也。

所以必更築觀者何? 尊之也。不於路寢，路寢本 所以行政處，非婦人之居也。小籐則嫌群公 [子]之舍，則已卑矣。故必改築於城郭之 內。《傳》曰:"築之、禮也，于外、非禮也。"

卿大夫[一]妻二妾者何? 尊賢重繼嗣也。不備姪娣何? 北面之臣賤，不足盡執 人骨肉之親。《禮服經》曰"貴臣賣妾。"明有卑賤妾也。

士一妻[一妾]何?下卿大 夫。《禮·喪服小記》曰:"士妾有子，則為之緦。"

娉嫡(夫)[未]往而死，賸當往否乎?人君不再娶之義也。天命不可保，故一 娶九女，以《春秋》伯姬卒，時娣李姬更嫁郎，《春秋》譏之。適夫人死後，更立夫人 者，不敢以卑賤承宗廟。自立其娣者，尊大國也。《春秋傳》曰:"叔姬歸于紀。"叔 姬者、伯姬之娣也。伯姬卒，叔姬升于嫡，《經》不譏也。

或曰: 嫡死不復更立，明嫡 無二，防篡煞也。祭宗廟，攝而已。以禮不聘為妾，明不升。

《曾子問》曰:"昏禮，既納幣，有吉日，女之父母死，何如?孔子曰:"壻使人 (吊)[弔]之。如壻之父母死，女亦使人(吊)[弔]之。父喪稱父，母喪稱母，父 母不在，則稱伯父世(尊)[母]。壻已葬，壻之伯父叔父使人致命女氏曰:某子有父 母之喪，不得嗣為兄弟，使(母)[某]致命。女氏許諾，不敢嫁，禮也。壻免喪，女 父使人請，堉不娶而後嫁之，禮也。女之父母死，堉亦如之。"

婦人所以有師何? 學事人之道也。《詩》云:"言告師氏，言告言歸。"

《(禮昏)[昏禮]經》曰:"(告)[教]于公宮三月。"婦人學一時，足以成矣。

[與君有緦麻之親者]，[教於公宮三月]，與君無親者，各教於宗廟[宗]婦之室。國君取 大夫之妾、士之妻老無子者而明於婦道又祿之，使教宗室五屬之女。大夫士皆有宗 族，自於宗子之室學事人也。

女必有傅姆何? 尊之也。《春秋傳》曰:" 傅至矣，姆未 至。"

婦人學事舅姑，不學事(必父母)[夫]者，示婦與夫一體也。《禮·內則》曰: "妾事夫人，如事舅姑，尊嫡絕拓嫉之原。"《禮服傳》曰:"妾事女君與事舅姑同" 也。婦事夫，有四禮焉:雞初鳴，咸盥漱，櫛(縱)[縱]笄總而朝，君臣之道也。惻 隱之恩，父子之道也。會計有無，兄弟之道也。閨閫之內，衽席之上，朋友之道也。聞 見異辭，故設此也。

有五不娶。亂家之子不娶，逆家之子[不娶]，世有刑人、惡疾，喪婦長子，此不 娶也。

出婦之義必送之，接以賓客之禮，君子絕愈于小人之交。《詩》云:"薄送我 畿。"

天子[之]妃謂之后何? 后[者]、君也。[天子妃至尊]，天下尊之。故謂之 后[也]。明海內小人之君子也。天下尊之，故繫王言之，[曰王后也]。《春秋 傳》曰:"迎王后于紀。" 國君之妻，稱之曰夫人何?明當扶進(夫)[八]人，謂八 妾也。國人尊之，故稱君夫人也。自稱小童者，謙也。言己智能寡少，如童蒙也。《論 語》曰:"國君之妻，[君]稱之曰夫人，夫人自稱曰小童，國人稱之曰君夫人。稱諸 異邦日寡小君。"謂聘問兄弟之國，及臣[於]他國稱之。謙之辭也。

妻[妾]者、何謂[也]?妻者、齊也，與夫齊體。自天子下至庶人，其義一也。

妾者、接也，以時接見也。

嫁娶者、何謂也?嫁者、家也。婦人外成，以出適人為嫁。娶者、取也。男女 [者、何] 謂 [也]?

男者、任也，任功業也。女者、如也，從如人也。在家從父母， 既嫁從夫,夫沒從子也。《傳》曰:"婦人有三從之義也。"

夫婦者，何謂也?夫者， 扶也,扶以人道者也。婦者、服也，服於家事，事人者也。

[妃者，匹也]，(配) [妃] 疋者何?謂相與偶也。

婚姻者、何謂也?[婚者]、昏時行禮，故謂之婚 也。[姻者]、婦人因夫而成，故曰姻。《詩》云"不惟舊因"，謂夫也。又曰"燕爾 新婚"，謂婦也。所以昏時行禮何? 示陽下陰也。(婚)[昏]亦陰陽交時也。

男子六十閉房何?所以輔衰也，故重性命也。又曰:父子不同椸，為亂長幼之序 也。《禮·內則》曰:"妾雖老，未滿五十，必預五日之御。"滿五十不御，俱為助 寰也。

至七十大衰，食非肉不飽，寢非人不暖，故七十復開房也。

XL. Marriage.

235. General Discussion on Marriage. (9.1a-b; 4 .9b; 10.1a-b)

a. Why is it that marriage belongs to the ways of man? It is because of the emotions and instincts there are none so important as [those between] man and woman. In the intercourse between man and woman, as the beginnings of human relationships ¹, there is nothing [so important] as the relation between husband and wife. The I says: "When the generating forces of Heaven and Earth intermingle the ten thousend things get their transformation and fertility; when the seeds of male and female are united the ten thousand things are transformed and produced" ². Man is to assist Heaven and Earth in the keeping in motion of the yin and the yang, therefore the institution of marriage is set up to emphasize human relationships and enlarge his progeny. The Li pao fu chi says: "When one is cautious in arranging a marriage for one's son or daughter one always chooses [a mate in whose family] for generations consideration for others and sense of the right principles have been observed" ³.

b. Why is it that according to the rites the man takes his wife, whereas the woman leaves her house? It is because the yin [to which a woman belongs] is lowly, and should not have the initiative; it proceeds to the yang in order to be completed. Therefore the Chuan says: "The yang leads, the yin conforms; the man goes [ahead], the woman follows" ⁴.

236. One Does Not Marry on One's Own Initiative. (9.1b; 4 .9b-10a; 10.1b)

Why is it that a man does not marry on his own initiative, and neither does a woman on hers, [but for both] the marriage must proceed from the parents, and be arranged through a go-between? It is to keep shame at a distance and to avoid debauchery. The Shih says: "How should we take a wife? We must first announce it to our parents" ⁵. Again it says: "How should we take a wife? Without go-between it cannot be done" ⁶.

237. The Time for Marriage. (9.1b-2b; 4 .10a-10b; 10.2b-4b)

a. Why ⁷ does the man take a wife at thirty, while the woman marries at twenty? The number of yang is odd, the number of yin is even. Why ⁸ [does] the man [marry at] an older age than the woman? The way ⁹ of yang is slow, the way ¹⁰ of yin is fast. At thirty a man's sinews and bones have become hard and strong, and he is ready to become the father of his children; at twenty a woman's flesh and muscles are fully developed, and she is ready to become the mother of her children. Combined together they make [the age of] fifty, corresponding to the number of the Great Expansion ¹¹, which begets the ten thousand things. Therefore the Li nei tsê says: "At thirty a man is adult and begins a household; at twenty a woman is adult and is given in marriage" ¹². Seven is the yang of the year [cycle], eight is the yin of the year [cycle] ¹³. Seven and eight make fifteen; the number of the yin and yang [added together] is then complete, and there is the mutual wish to mate. Therefore the Li chi says: "A girl is promised in marriage at fifteen, when she receives a hair-pin and her style" ¹⁴. The rites speak of hair-pin ¹⁵, [indicating by it that] the yin is bound to the yang, by which [she has reached] the period that she is exclusively [destined for] one [man]. The yang, being higher, need not be bound ¹⁶. Yang goes slow, yin goes fast. With thirty the numbering of three terminates, odd is yang's measure; with twenty the numbering of two terminates, even is yin's measure ¹⁷. Yang reaches the Small Perfection in yin, the Great Perfection in yang, therefore [the man is] capped at twenty and marries at thirty. Yin reaches the Small Perfection in yang, the Great Perfection in yin, therefore [the woman] receives a hair-pin at fifteen and is married at twenty.

b. Another opinion says: "At twenty-five the man is bound with his heart to a woman, because that is the point at which the yang approaches the yin" ¹⁸. The Ch'un ch'iu ku liang chuan says: "At twenty-five the man is bound with his heart [to a woman], at fifteen the woman is promised in marriage. [This is] under the influence of [the alternation of] the yin and yang" ¹⁹. The number of yang is seven, the number of yin is eight. At the age of eight the boy sheds his teeth, at the age of seven the girl sheds her teeth ²⁰. [But] the number of yang is odd, therefore ²¹ it is three. Three times eight make twenty-four plus one make twenty-five ²², [so at twenty-five the man] ties his heart. The number of yin is even, therefore ²³ it is two. The woman matures at [the age of] fourteen ²⁴ [twice seven] plus one making fifteen ²⁵; therefore at fifteen she is promised in marriage. In either case one is added, meaning that both ²⁶ have tied their hearts exclusively one [to the other]. Why is there this tying of the heart? It is to avoid debauchery ²⁷.

238. The Presents which are Offered, and the Words which are Used When Concluding the Preliminaries and When Sending the First Present as a Token of the Choice. (9.2b-3a; 4 .10b-11b; 10.4b-6a)

a. [According to] the rites ²⁸ when a girl is fifteen she is promised in marriage. [When the bridegroom's father] sends [the first present to confirm his] choice, when he asks for the [girl's] name, when news is sent of the favourable result of the divination, when he asks for the time [of the wedding-ceremony], and at the meeting [of the bride by the bridegroom] in person, [on these five occa- sion] a goose is used as the present ²⁹. As the present for the completion [of the preliminaries] black and red [silk] is used ³⁰ and not a goose ³¹.

b. The use of a goose as a present is because it symbolizes [the migration to] the south and [return to] the north, the following of the seasons, and the never missing the right moment; it indicates that the girl is not robbed of her [right] time. The goose is also a bird which follows the yang [sun], as the wife's duty is to follow her husband ³². Then [the goose is used] because they form rows in flying and queues in resting, as the marriage ritual [institution requires that] old and young have their proper places and do not trespass upon each other['s positions]. Since the marriage-rites [demand that] a dead pheasant shall not be used as a present, a [live] goose is offered ³³.

c. As the present for the completion [of the preliminaries] a bundle of black and red silk and the li-p'i³⁴ [are sent]; black silk, three [rolls of two pieces], as a symbol of Heaven, red silk, two [rolls of two pieces], as a symbol of Earth, [for the number of] yang is odd [and the number of] yin is even ³⁵: it is to denote that the nature of yang is greater [than that of yin]. The li-p'i are two [deer-]skins, with which to cover the court-hall. The covering of the court-hall is [done with an] even [number of skins]. The Li hun ching says: "At the sending of [the first present to confirm the] choice, when asking for the [girl's] name, when announcing the favourable result of the divination, when asking for the time [of the wedding-ceremony], and at the meeting in person [of the bride, on all these five occasions] a goose is used. As the present for the completion [of the preliminaries] a bundle of [black and red] silk and two [deer-] skins [are used]" ³⁶.

d. The words [used by the messenger] when offering the present for the completion [of the preliminaries] are ³⁷: "His honour [your master] has expressed his distinguished ³⁸ desire to present a wife to [my master's son] So-and-so. [My master] So-and-so ³⁹, in accordance with the custom of the ancients, [sends] two [deer-] skins and a bundle of silk. He has ordered [me,] So-and-so, to invite you to accept these gifts". The first So-and-so [indicates] the name of the bridegroom 壻 ⁴⁰the second So-and-so [indicates] the name of the bridegroom's father ⁴¹, the third So-and-so [indicates] the name of the messenger. The father of the girl replies: "His honour [your master], in compliance with the ancient rules, has favoured [me,] So-and-so, with this valuable present, [which I,] So-and-so, do not dare to refuse. Would I dare not to conform to his orders?"

e. The words [spoken by the messenger] when offering [the first present to confirm the] choice are ⁴²: "His honour [your master] is so gracious as to present ⁴³ a wife to [my master's son] So-and-so. [My master,] So-and-so, according to the custom of the ancients, has sent [me,] So-and-so, to invite you to accept these gifts". The reply is: "[My,] So-and-so's daughter is dull and stupid, besides which she is unteachable. [But since] his honour [your master] has ordered it, [I,] So-and-so dare not refuse".

239. The Meeting of the Person of the Bride and the Handing of the Mounting-Cord. (9.3b; .11b-12a; 10.6a-7b)

Why is it that from the Son of Heaven down to the common officer [the bridegroom] must meet [his bride] in person and offer the end of the mounting-cord to her [to get into the carriage? It is here the case of] the yang descending to the yin. [The man] wishes to please the heart [of his bride], it is the token of his affection for her ⁴⁴. The husband ⁴⁵ meets her in person, [he drives the carriage for] three revolutions of the wheels, descends, and looks askance at her; this is to avoid [feelings of] uncontrolled passion ⁴⁶. The Shih says: "[King] Wên fixed on a lucky day and went in person to meet her on the [river] Wei; he arranged boats to form a bridge, amply illustrious was the splendour" ⁴⁷. The Li hun ching says: "The guest ⁴⁸ ascends [the steps], faces north, lays down his goose, and salutes twice, knocking his head against the ground ⁴⁹. [Then] he descends [the steps] and goes out. The bride follows from out of her room ⁵⁰, descending from the western steps. The bridegroom mounts the bride's carriage, and hands her the mounting-cord" ⁵¹.

240. The Giving Away of the Daughter and the Exhortation to Her. (9.3b-4a; 4 .12a; 10.7b-8a)

a. The giving away [in marriage] of the daughter [by the father] takes place before the shrine of his deceased father in the ancesral temple, to honour the remains ⁵² of the ancestors. [The girl's father] does not dare to act of his own accord, so he announces it [first] to the shrine of his deceased father ⁵³.

b. Why do the parents in person exhort ⁵⁴ their daughter? It is [the expression of] their extreme love for their child. The father says: "Be careful ⁵⁵ and reverent. Day and night do not ⁵⁶ neglect the commands [of thy parents-in-law]" ⁵⁷. The mother, giving her a sash and a handkerchief ⁵⁸, says: "Be diligent and reverent. Day and night do not neglect the rules of the household" ⁵⁹. The father exhorts her at [the head of] the eastern steps, the mother exhorts her at [the head of] the western steps ⁶⁰. The father's concubine accompanies her to the inner side of the gate and gives her a silk girdle-purse; she impresses her with her parents' commands, and instructs her, saying ⁶¹: "Reverently and respect- fully remember ⁶² the words of thy father and mother. Day and night be without blame. Let thyself be reminded of them by this sash and this girdle-purse" ⁶³.

c. [Thus] leaving [her parents' home] the girl does not bid farewell, neither does she reply to the exhortations, because she feels embarrassed and thinks it hard to go.

241. The Wedding is Not a Case for Congratulations. (9.4a; 4 .12a-b; 10.8a-b)

According to the rites ⁶⁴ "in the family of the girl who has been given in marriage the fire is not extinguished for three days; [they spend the time waking and] thinking of the [coming] separation. In the family of the man who takes the wife no music is made during three days; they think [of the fact that the son is going to] succeed his father" ⁶⁵. They feel sad at [the thought that] the father has grown feeble and old in the course of years and that [the time of his] being replaced [by the son] has arrived. The Li says: "The wedding is not [a case] for congratulations; it is [a case of] generations succeeding each other" ⁶⁶.

242. The Words Spoken at the Handing of the Mounting-Cord and at the Meeting of the Bride. (9.4a; 4 .12b; 10.9a)

a. [When the bridegroom] hands the mounting-cord [to the bride], the duenna declines [on her behalf] saying: "She has not yet been taught, [and has] not [the knowledge] sufficient to exchange ceremonies with thee" ⁶⁷.

b. When [the bridegroom] first meets [his bride] in person, the usher invites him ⁶⁸ [to state his business, upon which] he replies ⁶⁹ "His honour [your master] has instructed [my father] So-and-so, that the wedding will begin this moment. He has ordered [me,] So-and-so, to execute [the rites], and I request [to be allowed] to do as he has commanded". The host says: "[I,] So-and-so, with sincere respect ⁷⁰ have prepared all that is necessary" ⁷¹.

243. What the Father Says When He Pledges His Son. (9.4a-b; 4 .12b; 10.9a)

When the father pledges his son and sends him to meet [his bride] ⁷², he admonishes him ⁷³ saying: "Go and meet thy helpmeet, that [with her] thou mayst succeed me in the sacrifices to the ancestral temple. With diligence ⁷⁴ lead her, [but also] with respect, [for she is] the successor of thy mother after her death. In thy [behaviour] there should be constancy" ⁷⁵. The son says: "Yes, only I fear that I cannot undertake [the task] ⁷⁶. I shall [,however,] not dare to neglect your command" ⁷⁷.

244. What is Meant by Not Immediately Presenting the Wife to the Ancestral Temple. (9.4b; 4 .12b; 10.9a)

After the man has married his wife, he does not immediately present her to [his ancestors in] the ancestral temple; this is to indicate that [her place is] not yet definitely fixed ⁷⁸. It is [also] the reason why, according to the marriage-rites, [when the bridegroom's father] asks for the time of the wedding, [the bride's father] does not dare to be definite ⁷⁹.

245. The Presenting to the Ancestral Temple. (9.4b; .12b-13a; 10.9b-10a)

After the wife has been in [her husband's home] for three months she takes part in the sacrifices [to the ancestors of her husband] ⁸⁰. If her parents-in-law are dead the wife, after having been three months in [her husband's home], also offers vegetables [to their shrines] in the ancestral temple ⁸¹. Three months [constitute] a season, [in which] the things have their [seasonal] completion, and the good and bad [qualities] of man can be known ⁸². After this [period of trial] she may participate in the rites of sacrificing in the ancestral temple. Tsêng-tzŭ says: "If a woman dies before she has been presented to [the ancestors of her husband in] the ancestral temple . . . . the body is returned to be interred in [the cemetery of] her kindred, which indicates that she has not yet become his wife in the full sense" ⁸³.

246. The Wedding Takes Place in Spring. (9.4b-5a; 4 .13a; 10.10b-11a)

Why ⁸⁴ must the wedding take place in spring? Spring ⁸⁵ is the time when Heaven and Earth communicate, when the ten thousand things begin to live, and when the yin and yang touch each other. The Shih says: "A knight who brings home his wife must do so before the ice melts" ⁸⁶. The Chou kuan says: "In the second month of spring [the officer in charge of marriages] orders ⁸⁷ the gathering of the men and women. He orders the men of thirty to take a wife, and the women of twenty to be married" ⁸⁸. The Hsia hsiao chêng says: "The second month is the time when young men are capped and take a wife" ⁸⁹.

247. The Wife May Not Leave the Husband. (9.5a; 4 .13a; 10.11a-b)

The reason that, [even] when the husband behaves badly, his wife has no right to leave him lies in the principle that Earth does not separate from Heaven. Though the husband [behaves] badly the wife is not allowed to leave him. Therefore the Li chiao t'ê shêng says: "Once having shared the ceremonial meal with [her husband the wife] shall never change" ⁹⁰. The violation of human relationships, the killing of the wife's parents, and the abolishment of the principles of social bonds ⁹¹ belong to the greater crimes. [Only in the case of] these principles being transgressed is it allowed [to the wife] to leave [her husband].

248. What is Meant by the Son of Heaven and a Feudal Lord Obtaining Concubines Who Accompany the Principal Wife. (9.5a-6a; 4 .13b-14a; 10.11b-13b)

a. Why is it that the Son of Heaven and the Feudal Lords marry nine wives at a time? It is to emphasize the importance of their states and to enlarge their progeny. Why does it happen to be nine ⁹²? It is modelled on Earth with its nine provinces which, responding to Heaven's creative force, leaves nothing without life. To take nine women in one ⁹³ marriage should likewise be sufficient to meet the requirements of the Lord's creative force ⁹⁴. If with nine women he does not beget children, [then even] one hundred would not produce results. The Wang tu chi says: "The Son of Heaven and the Feudal Lords ⁹⁵ marry nine women at a time". The Ch'un ch'iu kung yang chuan⁹⁶ says: "When a Feudal Lord marries a woman from one state, then two other states send each a concubine to accompany her, [in all three cases] with her cousin and sister following" ⁹⁷. What is meant by cousin? [Her father's] elder brother's daughter. And by sister? The girl's younger sister ⁹⁸.

b. Some say: "The Son of Heaven marries twelve wives, modelling himself on Heaven with its twelve months, [during which period] the ten thousand things are bound to [complete their cycle of] life" ⁹⁹.

c. Why must he only marry once? It is to avoid debauchery and to prevent him casting away virtue and indulging in passion. Therefore he only marries once; the Lord of men has no right to marry twice.

d. [The marriage with the principal wife is] completed by a suite of her cousin and her younger sister to ensure that there will be no mutual jealousy. When one woman bears a child three women will share [her joy], as if they had borne it themselves ¹⁰⁰.

e. Why does he not take two younger sisters? It is in order to extend [his progeny by] foreign blood. Why does he take women from three [different] states? It is to widen [his progeny by] foreign stock ¹⁰¹; [if he took all nine women from] one state it is feared that, their blood being much alike, no children at all will be produced.

f. The cousin and the younger sister, even though still young, follow the principal wife ¹⁰², which indicates that the Lord has no right to marry twice. They are [however,] returned to await [the coming of] their years in the state of their parents, [because] they are not yet prepared to respond to the Lord['s wants] ¹⁰³. The Shih says: "All the cousins and younger sisters followed her, in great numbers like a cloud. The Lord of Han looked round at them, resplendent, they filled the gate" ¹⁰⁴. The Kung yang chuan says: "Shu-chi went to Chi [as concubine]" ¹⁰⁵. It is clear that she had been awaiting [the coming of] her years.

g. When two states send concubines to which is [the precedence in] honour given? The greater state takes precedence. If both states are alike ¹⁰⁶ [in size] they are judged by their spiritual power; if their spiritual power is alike they are judged by the beauty [of the girls].

h. The adherents of the Principle of Substance model themselves on Heaven, and reverence the left. The adherents of the Principle of Form model themselves on Earth, and reverence the right ¹⁰⁷.

i. Why [is a woman] not ceremoniously betrothed to become a concubine? [All] men have the right ¹⁰⁸ to want an honourable [place] for their children and grandchildren, and one should not invite a man to [let his daughter] take a lowly [position]. The Ch'un ch'iu chuan says: "Two states came to offer concubines ¹⁰⁹. Why is it proper to invite a man to be a common officer, but not to invite a man to [let his daughter] be a concubine? A common officer is honoured at once [in his position], and when gradually his capacities [reveal themselves] he will not remain a common officer. But a concubine, however worthy, will never become a principal wife.

249. The Divination for the Wedding. (9.6a-b; 4 .14a-b; 10.13b)

Why is it that in taking a wife the tortoise-shell is consulted? To divine the girl's spiritual power, in order to know whether [the couple] will suit each other or not. It is stated in the Hun li ching: "[The messenger of the bride-groom's parents says: 'I, So-and-so, have been instructed that my master] is about to consult the tortoise-shell; may I venture to ask ¹¹⁰ to which family the girl belongs'?" ¹¹¹

250. The Sovereign or the Head of the Major Lineage Marrying by Himself. (9.6b; 4 , 14b; 10.14a-b)

When a Sovereign or the head of the major lineage ¹¹² has no ¹¹³ parents he arranges his marriage himself. The lower does not conduct [a ceremony] for the higher, nor the lowly for the honourable, therefore he arranges it himself. The Hun li ching¹¹⁴ says: "When both parents [of the head of the major lineage] are dead he himself ¹¹⁵ gives the orders [for the arrangements of his marriage]". The Shih says: "[King] Wên fixed on a lucky day, and went in person to meet [her, his bride,] on the [river] Wei" ¹¹⁶.

251. A Great Officer Having Received a Fief Cannot Re-Marry . (9.6b; 4 .14b; 10.15a)

A great officer who, having acquired merit, receives ¹¹⁷ a fief, obtains the right to make up [the number] of his concubines to eight, in order to emphasize the importance of his [newly acquired] state and to extend his progeny. He is not [,however, allowed] to enter into a new marriage-alliance with a large state, in order that he may not forget his original principal wife. The Li says: "In sending presents to a daughter [who has been definitely taken as the wife] of a great officer it is said: [That she may now be] prepared for [her task of] sweeping and sprinkling" ¹¹⁸.

252. The Heir and the Lord Must Submit to the Same Rites. (9.6b; 4 .14b; 10.15a)

The eldest son ¹¹⁹ of the Son of Heaven and the Heir of a Feudal Lord both take their wives according to the rites [prescribed] for a Feudal Lord ¹²⁰. [They are considered] the same as the Lord, which means that they [also] have no right to marry twice.

253. The Son of Heaven Must Take a Wife from a Large State. (9.6b-12a; 4 . 14b-15a; 10.15a-16a). In its paging the Y. ed. skips fol. 7a-11b.

a. When the King takes a wife he must first choose from among the daughters of a large state. The ritual regulations provide many places from which this appears ¹²¹. The Shih says: "In a large state there was a young lady, she looked as if she were a younger sister of Heaven. [King] Wên fixed on a lucky day, and went in person to meet [her, his bride,] on the [river] Wei" 489, which proves that the King must take his wife from [among the daughters of] a large state.

b. The Ch'un ch'iu says: "The Marquis of Chi came to court" ¹²². The Viscount of Chi had married his daughter to the Son of Heaven, therefore his rank was raised and he was called Marquis. In the course of the following decades the Marquis of Chi ac_ quired no other merit than that his daughter had become Queen [by the grace] of Heaven ¹²³. When, therefore, his rank is mentioned as being that of Marquis, we know that although [the Viscount of Chi had only] a small state, [his rank] must [be that of one] enfeoffed with a large state. It means that he had reached [a position of] honour which prevented him being treated as a [mere] subject [by the Son of Heaven].

c. Why does the King extend his [choice of] marriage-alliances [even] to minor states? ¹²⁴ It is to open the way for the worthy in all under Heaven; it indicates that the capable will not be neglected. Therefore the Ch'un ch'iu says: "The Marquis of Chi came to court". In [this] statement ¹²⁵ [the word] Marquis is added, indicating that he had been enfeoffed. He had first to be enfeoffed, to indicate that [marriage] ceremonies were not concluded with a minor state ¹²⁶.

d. What is to be done with the country of a woman [who is the wife of the Son of Heaven], when her conduct proves to be deficient and she is removed? [It is dealt with] on the analogy of [the country of] one who is enfeoffed [with the rank of] a Feudal Lord ¹²⁷.

254. A Feudal Lord May Not Marry From Within His State. (9.12a-b; 4 .15a; 10.16a-b)

Why is not a Feudal Lord allowed to take his wife ¹²⁸ from [among the women] within his [own] state? A Feudal Lord has no right to enfeoff on his own initiative, while it would not do to treat the parents [of his wife] as subjects. The Ch'un ch'iu chuan says: "Sung had no great officers for three generations. [The Ch'un ch'iu] condemns [the Lords of Sung for their] taking their wives from [among the great officers' daughters] within [the state]" ¹²⁹.

255. A Girl of the Same Clan-Name or of the Same Maternal Clan is Not Taken as a Wife. (9.12b; 4 .15b; 10.16b-17b)

a. The reason why a girl of the same clan-name is not taken as a wife is out of respect to the human relationships, to prevent debauchery, and to avoid being [on] the same [level] as the beasts ¹³⁰. The Lun yü says: "The Lord [of Lu] married a daughter of [the state of] Wu, of the same clan-name as himself, and called her the Elder daughter of Wu" ¹³¹. The Ch'ü li says: "In buying a concubine whose clan-name is not known divination is employed" ¹³².

b. Neither does one take as a wife a girl from among one's mother's relatives [who is related to the degree that for her] the five months' mourning or more [is worn] ¹³³. As it is said in the Ch'un ch'iu chuan: "He was blamed for taking as a wife a girl of his mother's clan" ¹³⁴.

256. A Feudal Lord of the Same Clan-Name Conducting the Nuptials. (9.12b-13a; 4 .15b-16a; 10.18a-19a)

a. Why is it that when the King marries his daughter [to a Feudal Lord], he must employ a Feudal Lord of the same clan-name [as the King's] to conduct [the ceremonies]? In the marriage-rites it is [the preservation of] harmony that is the precious thing. It would not do [for the King and the Feudal Lord] to converse with one another [on the same level], because that would harm the correct relation between Lord and subject. Moreover [the King], in employing [an intermediary for] his daughter, does not want his majesty as Son of Heaven to overawe the Feudal Lord ¹³⁵. The Ch'un ch'iu chuan says: "When the Son of Heaven marries his daughter to a Feudal Lord, he must employ another Feudal Lord of the same clan-name to conduct [the ceremonies]. When a Feudal Lord marries his daughter to a great officer, he must ¹³⁶ employ a great officer of the same clan-name to conduct [the ceremonies]" ¹³⁷. That [a Feudal Lord or a great officer of] the same clan-name should be employed ¹³⁸, is because, being of the same clan and having a common ancestor, he is fit to conduct [the nuptials of] his cognates, so that he is employed to substitute in the affairs [appertaining to] a father ¹³⁹. Why does [the Son of Heaven] not employ a Minister of the same clan-name to conduct [the nuptials of his daughter to a Feudal Lord]? It is because the majesty attached to the exalted position of the Feudal Lord would not [make the Minister] feel at ease.

b. Why does [the Son of Heaven] not employ a Feudal Lord of the same clan-name to conduct [the nuptials of his daughter] in the capital? It is because the Feudal Lord [who is to be married] will have to meet his bride in person; to enter the capital would [for him] mean to go to the Son of Heaven for an audience, and the rites [required for this audience and for the wedding] do not go together. The Ch'un ch'iu chuan says: "A reception-house was built for the King's daughter outside [the city-wall of Lu]" ¹⁴⁰. It means that [the Feudal Lord, going to meet his bride, the King's daughter,] did not [have to] enter the [King's] capital.

c. Why must a special reception-house be built? It is to honour [the King's daughter]. She is not lodged in the lu-ch'in¹⁴¹, it being the place for the administration of the government, and not fit for a woman to dwell in. The hsiao-ch'in¹⁴² would be too depreciatory, while the room for the Duke's daughters ¹⁴³ would constitute a slight to her ¹⁴⁴. Therefore a special building within the city-walls is erected. The Chuan says: "To build [a reception-house] is according to the rites. [To build it] outside [the city- wall] is not according to the rites" ¹⁴⁵.

257. The Rules for a MInister, a Great Officer, and a Common Officer Taking a Wife and Concubines. (9.13a-b; 4 .16a-b; 10.19a-b)

a. Why [is] a Minister or a great officer [entitled to take] one wife ¹⁴⁶ and two concubines? It is to honour his worthiness, and to emphasize the importance of his progeny. Why does he not complete [his marriage] by taking [his wife's father's] elder brother's daughter and [his wife's] younger sister? It is because he is a subject who faces north, and his authority is too small ¹⁴⁷ and insufficient [to entitle him] to take all the relatives of another house ¹⁴⁸. The Li fu ching says: "[The three months' mourning is worn by a Minister or a great officer for] his senior servant or his senior concubine" ¹⁴⁹. It means that there is also a lower concubine.

b. Why [is] a common officer [only entitled to] one wife and one concubine ¹⁵⁰? [It is because his rank is] below a Minister or a great officer. The Li sang fu hsiao chi¹⁵¹ says: "A common officer wears the three months' mourning for his concubine when she has a child" ¹⁵².

258. At the Death of the Principal Wife of the Lord One of the Accompanying Concubines is called to Substitute for Her. (9.13b; 4 .16b; 10.19b-20b)

a. When a woman has been betrothed to be the principal wife, and she dies before she [can] proceed ¹⁵³ [to her husband], why ¹⁵⁴ must [one of] the accompanying concubines go [in her stead]? It is because the Sovereign has no ¹⁵⁵ right to marry twice, but as Heaven's [favourable] destiny cannot be secured, he marries nine women at one time. In the Ch'un ch'iu [it is related] that when Po-chi [of Lu] died, her youngest sister [,who should have gone to Chu-lou to take her sister's place as principal wife,] married Chêng instead. The Ch'un ch'iu condemns her ¹⁵⁶. When the principal wife dies, [another] principal wife is installed, because it would not do for a [concubine whose position is] lowly to partake [in the sacrifices] in the ancestral temple. The younger sister [of the deceased] is installed [as principal wife] as a matter of course, to honour the great state [from which she has come]. The Ch'un ch'iu chuan¹⁵⁷ says: "Shu-chi was married to Chi". Shu-chi was the younger sister of Po-chi. When Po-chi died, Shu-chi was raised to [the position of] principal wife, [which fact was] not condemned by the Classic ¹⁵⁸.

b. Another opinion is: "When the principal wife dies, another is not installed, meaning that there may not be two principal wives in order to prevent usurpation and murder. [One of the concubines may] substitute for [the deceased principal wife] in the sacrifices in the ancestral temple, but no more. The rites forbid the betrothal of a woman as concubine. This means that she cannot be raised [to the position of principal wife]" ¹⁵⁹.

259. The Marriage-Rites in the Case of a Calamity. (9.14a-b; 4 .16b-17a; 10.21b)

Tsêng-tzŭ asked, saying ¹⁶⁰: "If according to the marriage-rites the wedding-presents have been received and a propitious day has been fixed, and the parents of the girl die, what should be done?" ¹⁶¹ Confucius said: "The son-in-law will send someone to condole with her ¹⁶², and if it is the parents of the son-in-law who die, the girl ¹⁶³ will likewise send someone to condole with him ¹⁶⁴. If it is the father who dies [the messenger] mentions the [other] father [as having sent him]; if it is the mother who dies [the messenger] mentions the [other] mother [as having sent him]; if both parents are dead then [the messenger] mentions the father's elder brother and his wife ¹⁶⁵ [as having sent him]. When the son-in-law has buried [his dead], his father's elder brother or his father's younger brother ¹⁶⁶ will send someone to offer a release from the engagement ¹⁶⁷ to the girl's family, saying: 'It is the duty of the son of So-and-so ¹⁶⁸ to mourn for his parents, and he has no right to continue his relations with your daughter ¹⁶⁹. He has sent me, So-and-so ¹⁷⁰, to offer the release from the engagement'. It is according to the rites that the girl's family, [though] consenting [to the offer], does not dare to engage her [to another man]. When the son-in-law has ended his mourning, the girl's parents ¹⁷¹ send someone to request [the renewal of the engagement]. It is according to the rites that if the son-in-law does not [wish to] take her as his wife, thereafter she is married [to someone else]. If it is the parents of the girl who die, the son-in-law will act in the same way".

260. The Wife has a Teacher. (9.14b; 4 .17a-b; 10.22a-23a)

a. Why is it that a woman [about to be married] has a teacher? It is in order that she may learn the way of serving others. The Shih says: "I saw my teacher that I might be instructed; he instructed me in the duties of a wife" ¹⁷².

b. The Li hun ching¹⁷³ says: "[When a girl of a Feudal Lord's family has been promised in marriage. . .] she is instructed ¹⁷⁴ in [one of the rooms of] the Lord's palace for three months". The woman [about to be married] is instructed for one season, which is sufficient to make her accomplished ¹⁷⁵.

c. When a girl is related to the Lord in the degree whereby she must submit to a three months' mourning [or nearer], she receives instruction in [one of the rooms of] the Lord's palace for three months; when she is not related to the Lord, she receives instruction in the rooms of the wife of the head of the major lineage ¹⁷⁶. The Lord of the state, in taking one of the concubines of his great officer, or the wife of his common officer, who is aged and has no children, but possesses good knowledge of the duties of a wife, ¹⁷⁷ into his service, employs her to teach the girls who are [not] related to him [nearer than] in the fifth degree in the rooms of the head of the major lineage. It is only natural that the great officer or the common officer, in his own group of lineages, [has his female relatives taught also] in the rooms of the head of the major lineage [that they may] learn how to serve others.

d. Why should a woman have a teacher and a duenna? It is to honour her. The Ch'un ch'iu chuan says: "The teacher has come, but not yet the duenna" ¹⁷⁸.

261. The Meaning of Serving the Parents-in-Law and the Husband. (9.14b-15a; 4 .17b; 10.23a-b)

a. The wife learns to serve her parents-in-law, and not to serve her husband ¹⁷⁹, because wife and husband constitute one body. The Li nei tsê says: "The secondary wife serves the principal wife as [the latter] serves her parents-in-law. It originates from [the wish] to honour the first wife and to avoid jealousy" ¹⁸⁰. The Li fu chuan says: "The secondary wife serves the principal wife in the same way as [the latter] serves her parents-in-law" ¹⁸¹.

b. The wife serves her husband according to four principles ¹⁸². [Firstly,] on the first crowing of the cock she washes her hands and rinses her mouth, she combs her hair, draws over it a scarf of silk, fixes it with a pin, and fastens it ¹⁸³, then she meets [her husband]: this is the principle of [the relation of] Lord and subject ¹⁸⁴. [Secondly,] she feels affection [for him to such a degree that his loss results in] deep sorrow: that is the principle of [the relation of] father and son ¹⁸⁵. [Thirdly,] she keeps account of what there is and of what there is not: this is the principle of [the relation of] elder and younger brother ¹⁸⁶. [Fourthly,] within the doors [of the women's apartments] she sits with him on the mat: that is the principle of [the relation of] friends ¹⁸⁷. [On each occasion she] hears [him or] sees [him, she uses] different words. Therefore these [rules] have been established.

262. Five Cases of Not Marrying a Girl. (9.15a; 4 .17b; 10.24a)

There are five [cases] in which [a man] does not take a girl as his wife. He does not marry a girl of an unruly family, nor one of a licentious family. He does not marry a girl of a family which has convicts in it, or a girl suffering from an incurable disease, or a grown-up girl who is in mourning for the wife [of her father] ¹⁸⁸.

263. The Rites for a Divorced Wife. (9.15a-b; 4 .18a; 10.24a)

When a wife is divorced the proper attitude is to accompany her [or have her accompanied by a messenger to her original home], where she is received with the rites [appropriate] for a guest ¹⁸⁹. A Noble Man divorcing [his wife observes rites which are] more than the [blunt] handing over by a common man [of his divorced wife to her parents]. The Shih says: "[Not far, only a little way] did he accompany me to the threshold" ¹⁹⁰.

264. The Queen. (9.15b; 4 .18a-b; 10.25a-b)

Why is the spouse of the Son of Heaven called hou? Hou means Lord chün¹⁹¹. The spouse of the Son of Heaven is the most honourable [of women], so that she is called hou 'Lord', meaning that as mate to the most honourable [King] she is the Little Lord within the seas ¹⁹². All under Heaven reverence her, and therefore connect [her title] with [the word] wang 'King', calling her wang-hou¹⁹³. The Ch'un ch'iu chuan says: "[The Duke of Ts'ai came to Lu and immediately] went to meet the wang-hou 'Queen' at Chi" ¹⁹⁴. Why is the wife of the Lord of a state called fu-jên [by the Lord]? The meaning is that she is to assist ¹⁹⁵ and support eight persons, namely the eight concubines [of the Lord] ¹⁹⁶. The people of the state reverence her, and therefore call her the Lord's ju-jên. She calls herself hsiao-t'ung 'Little Lass', out of modesty. It means that her wisdom and capacity are small and tiny like [those of] a stupid child. The Lun yü says: "The wife of the Lord of a state is called fu-jên by the Lord ¹⁹⁷, she calls herself hsiao-t'ung 'Little Lass', the people of the state call her 'the Lord's fu-jên', in speaking with other states she is called kua hsiao-chün 'our Little Lord' ¹⁹⁸.

[The last term is] an expression of modesty used in referring to her when [the Lord is] visiting a friendly state, and when [one of her] subjects is in ¹⁹⁹ another state.

265. Principal Wife and Concubine. (9.15b-16a; 4 .18b; 10.25b)

a. What do [the words] ch'i 'principal wife', and ch'ieh 'concubine' mean? ²⁰⁰Ch'i means 'whole' ch'i²⁰¹. [The wife forms] one whole body with her husband. From the Son of Heaven down to the common man [the word ch'i is used with] the same meaning.

b. Ch'ieh means 'to connect' chieh²⁰². [The concubine] at regular times meets the man for connection.

266. The Meaning of Chia-Ch'ü , Nan-Nü , Fu-Fu, Hun-Yin. (9.16a-b; 4 .18b-19a; 10.26a-b)

a. What do [the words] chia-ch'ü²⁰³ 'marriage' mean? Chia means home chia²⁰⁴. The wife comes from outside to another house to make it her home ²⁰⁵. Ch'ü means to take ch'ü²⁰⁶.

b. What do [the words] nan-nü 'man and woman' mean? ²⁰⁷Nan means to be charged with jên²⁰⁸. He is charged with the task of completing an undertaking. Nü means to conform to ju²⁰⁹. She follows and conforms to another. In her home she follows her parents, when married she follows her husband, when her husband is dead she follows her son. The Chuan says: "A woman's duty is to follow [others in] three [cases]" ²¹⁰.

c. What do [the words] fu-fu²¹¹ 'husband and wife' mean? [The first] fu means to support fu²¹². To support with the principles [required] of man. [The second] fu means to submit fu²¹³. To submit to the duties of home, and to serve others.

d. Fei means mate p'i²¹⁴. What do [the words] fei-p'i²¹⁵ mean? That they are each other's mates ²¹⁶.

e. What do [the words] hun-yin mean? Hun means ²¹⁷ that the rites [of meeting the bride] are performed at dusk hun²¹⁸. Therefore it is spoken of as hun²¹⁹. Yin means ²²⁰ that the woman becomes his wife by following ²²¹ her husband. Therefore it is spoken of as yin. The Shih says: "Thou hast no regard for the old alliance" ²²². This was said with respect [to the alliance of the woman] to the husband. [The Shih says] again: "Thou feastest thy newly-wedded [wife]" ²²³. This was said with respect [to the alliance of the man] to the wife. Why are the rites performed at dusk? In order to indicate that the yang descends to the yin ²²⁴. Dusk ²²⁵ is also the time that the yin and the yang intermingle.

267. The Meaning of the Closing and the Opening of the Bed-Chamber. (9.16b; 4 .19a; 10.27a)

a. Why is it that a man at sixty closes the [door of his] bed-chamber? It is that he may take care of his feebleness. He thus pays attention to his life ['s strength] ²²⁶. The Li nei tsê says: "A concubine though she is old, if she has not yet reached the age of fifty, must cohabit with ²²⁷ [her master] every five days" ²²⁸. [When she has reached the] age of fifty she does not visit [her master any more, the abstinence] for both being helpful to [their mutually growing] feebleness.

b. When a man is seventy he has reached the stage of dotage: he cannot relish food without meat, he cannot get warm in bed without a bed-mate ²²⁹. Therefore at seventy he opens the (door of his] bed-chamber again [for his bed-mate to enter].